Are You Happy?

“Are you happy?” It’s a question that someone who attended a recent talk I gave asked me. The question is legitimate, and I’d imagine she’s not the only one wondering that. I know that many of the things I presented during my talk were the kinds of things that take time to process.

So, am I happy? I would say that I’m happy sometimes, but I’m unhappy other times- like any regular person, that is! I’m happy when I get to spend time with friends who make me smile, I’m happy when I see a beautiful sunset, and I’m happy when I see God using my situation to help others, I’m happy when I experience His presence in a powerful way. I’m unhappy, though, when the physical pain is really bad (which is often), when I want to do something that I physically am not capable of doing right not (which is also often), when I have to make really tough medical decisions that don’t seem to have a clear answer, when I feel lonely, etc.

Happiness is an emotion that is wonderful, but it is usually dependent on circumstances, and often on circumstances that we can’t necessarily control or replicate. We can easily be imprisoned by this emotion of happiness that we seek (and even chase), since outside circumstances usually decide whether or not we can experience the emotion. Happiness is wonderful yet all too fleeting, all too fickle. What I have that’s even more important than happiness, though, is joy. There is a difference between happiness and joy.

I’m talking about spiritual joy. It’s the kind of joy that is not dependent on circumstances. No one, no outcome, no circumstance can rob it from me, as those things aren’t the source of it in the first place. Spiritual joy is something that can persist despite any particular circumstance, which makes it extremely powerful. Its source is God alone, who is all-good and never-changing, so it’s a safe bet.

The joy I experience is despite my physical circumstances, not because of them. This joy is rooted in knowing Him, and knowing that I’m living for something much more than the here and now, however good or bad the here and now is. I’m living for eternity. I’m seeking things above, as St. Paul tells us to do. It’s knowing that even if my entire earthly life does not go like I want it to go, there is something more of even greater value. This isn’t it. What a relief! Now obviously that means I need to be living in line with God’s commandments, which is enough of a task, but at least the rest of the here and now doesn’t carry the weight that I often thought it did. Everything else, as earth-shattering as it might feel to me at times, is really small potatoes.

Maybe all of this boils down to more of a question of, “Are you joyful?” The joy that God gives us helps us endure everything else. Joy is the gift that keeps on giving. It’s the gift that the Bible tells us is our strength.

“…and do not be grieved, for the joy of the LORD is your strength.”

-Nehemiah 8:10 (RSVCE)

A little over a year ago, I met someone through my church parish. She happens to live a few streets over from me, and I walk in my neighborhood daily. She told me that she had seen me walking for quite some time and often wondered what my story was because I always seemed so happy to her. Ha! Little did she know my story at that time, much less how unhappy I sometimes am, in the earthly, emotional sense.

What I think she perceived in me those times she saw me walking when I didn’t even know her was a joy rooted in God, rooted in something other than the current circumstances. I’m certainly not always happy, though I wish I was. As always though, God is offering me something deeper and more challenging, yet also more beautiful, authentic, and consistent. While I’m not always happy, I do always have a joy that is not dependent on circumstance- a joy that is constant and solidly rooted in God and the gift of Jesus’ sacrifice. It’s a joy that no one and no thing can steal from me because it is not dependent on anything other than God, who is all-good and never fails us. Even when I’m unhappy, I can shift my focus deeper to the joy within, which is Him. Then, interestingly enough, I’m not quite as unhappy. Funny how He works, isn’t it?

Are you joyful? How has God led you to that place, if so? What’s holding you back, if not? Let me know in the comments!

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