What Is Mercy?

Happy Feast of Divine Mercy! As many of you know, I have a strong devotion to Divine Mercy that began with my dad’s death, and that devotion is increasing still. Go back in my archives and check out my past posts on Divine Mercy if you don’t know the story! Pretty cool.

This past Lent, I felt the Lord asking me to deepen my understanding and practice of mercy. It’s been a beautiful journey of which I’ve only begun. Just trying to understand what mercy actually is has been a challenge for me, in large part because I’ve known love to be merit-based in my human experience. In the past I felt confused about how to give mercy, knowing that we are supposed to love and forgive others, but knowing that at the same time, we cannot stand for injustice or affirm sin. Where does mercy land in that? What is the sweet spot?

Merriam Webster defines mercy in the following ways, where we see compassion as a theme:

• compassion, leniency, or kindness shown toward someone within one’s power to punish
• a blessing that is an act of divine favor or compassion
• compassionate treatment of those in distress

Compassion is a beautiful thing. I always want to give and receive compassion, but in difficult situations, where is the line between compassion and either being walked on or enabling? For so long I felt lost in that understanding, but recently I heard a wonderful talk on mercy that contained a quote by a philosopher. His definition of mercy captivated me and helped me to better understand what God’s mercy toward each of us actually is, and how to better give that mercy to others.

“Mercy, which is love encountering and overcoming evil, is the justice of the Kingdom…”

— Dr. Germain Grisez

Mercy is love encountering evil and overcoming it- what a rich definition! This rocked my world in the best way. I’m no philosopher, but I will share some of how the Lord worked on my heart and increased my understanding of mercy after hearing that quote.

Mercy is not a lack of justice- it is God’s justice. Mercy is not endorsing the bad but overcoming the bad with love. Evil (or bad) is a lack of good. Mercy is love meeting the lack and providing the very love that is lacking there. This was a missing connection for me. Mercy is not waiting for a certain response in order to love- mercy is giving love where that love is most needed and least “deserved.” And in those situations where we can feel like love is “least deserved,” it’s likely that the people acting or responding in negative ways are doing so precisely because they have not been well-loved in some areas of their lives. Hurtful behavior by others is so often a pain response on their part, coming from some wounds they have endured.

Mercy is not validating ill treatment as okay or signing up for abuse, but it’s willing the good of others, praying for them, and treating them with kindness, despite their actions– pouring the love that they are missing into them. Mercy is choosing to love others when that would not be the automatic human response based on their actions. It’s not accompanied by an affection for their hurtful behavior but a choice to will the good of the person underneath those undesirable actions. It’s seeing the person and wanting that person to have a leg up, to have a chance.

Of course since God wanted me to grow in the practice of mercy this Lent, He gave me some good opportunities to practice mercy, haha! Some of those situations were particularly difficult, but Lent was preparing me for this challenge. I found myself particularly captivated by the second verse of “What Wondrous Love Is This.”

When I was sinking down, sinking down, sinking down,
When I was sinking down, O my soul!
When I was sinking down beneath God’s righteous frown,
Christ laid aside His crown for my soul, for my soul,
Christ laid aside His crown for my soul.

When I was sinking down is precisely when Christ met me with His love. He didn’t have to do that- He chose to do that. I didn’t earn or deserve Him meeting me there, but He met me there and then awaited my response. As the son of God, Jesus had a crown that was well-deserved, but He chose humility over wearing that crown. Isn’t that what He asks us to do in love of others? In a particular situation I found myself in, someone who hurt me deeply was admitting fault but hadn’t made different efforts yet. I realized that I had to set aside my pride even though I was the wronged party and just love the other person. I needed to love the other person despite the hurt I was feeling because that is what God asks, and because that is what God does for me. I was called to pray for that person and treat that person well, even though a change in the situation hadn’t come yet. That is mercy.

Then John’s gospel on Holy Thursday solidified this for me. One line in particular stuck with me:

 “Before the feast of Passover, Jesus knew that his hour had come to pass from this world to the Father. He loved his own in the world and he loved them to the end.“

-John 13:1

Jesus didn’t stop loving them- He loved them to the end. Jesus washed Judas’ feet even though He knew Judas was about to betray Him, leading to His horrific death. That’s mercy- that’s love encountering evil and overcoming it. Jesus wasn’t thrown off course by the evil- He one-upped evil by choosing to love. Jesus washed Peter’s feet even though He knew Peter was about to deny knowing Him three times. After the denials, Jesus didn’t disqualify Peter from becoming the first pope- He still wanted Peter to live out the mission He had given to him. Incredible.

Jesus offers all of us His radical mercy- what an incredible gift. It doesn’t mean we get to keep going down wrong paths though, just presuming that all will be well because of His mercy. We either accept or reject His mercy by the choices we make, by how we live our lives. Our adhering to the commandments and loving as He asks us to love isn’t just about following a list of rules, but it’s about a response to God’s incredible mercy toward us. It’s personal.

And I have to say that there was something freeing about making the choice to double down in love in a situation where I could’ve washed my hands. I saw the opportunity to give and be Jesus to someone in a deeper way, and that helped me to experience God’s mercy towards me in a deeper way. Had I not chosen to love and pray well in that situation, what a missed opportunity that would’ve been. I don’t always see the fruits, but I don’t have to see fruits to know that love is the right choice. I just have to be obedient to God and let Him handle the rest. Jesus, I trust in You.

The penetrating rays in the image of Divine Mercy have always captured my heart in a powerful way, and now I’m specifically picturing those rays for what they are: God’s love meeting every wound and lack in myself and overcoming them. He extends those rays of mercy to each of us, and that is our source of hope. Thanks be to God for this amazing, undeserved gift! It’s up to us how to respond to His great gift of mercy every day. Receiving that mercy and then extending mercy to others is the appropriate response to the incredible mercy Jesus offers us. Imagine how much better the world would be if everyone lived rooted in His mercy and then responded by treating others mercifully. It can start with us, this Divine Mercy Sunday!

For the sake of His sorrowful Passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world.

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