I’ll never forget the first time I read the Litany of Humility. Years ago my spiritual director at the time suggested I pray with it, and I was immediately uncomfortable when I read it. I knew there was something to it, but I didn’t feel like I could pray it and mean it. The prayer goes as such:
O Jesus, meek and humble of heart, Hear me.
From the desire of being esteemed, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the desire of being loved, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the desire of being extolled, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the desire of being honored, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the desire of being praised, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the desire of being preferred to others, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the desire of being consulted, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the desire of being approved, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the fear of being humiliated, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the fear of being despised, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the fear of suffering rebukes, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the fear of being calumniated, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the fear of being forgotten, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the fear of being ridiculed, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the fear of being wronged, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the fear of being suspected, Deliver me, O Jesus.
That others may be loved more than I, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That others may be esteemed more than I, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That, in the opinion of the world, others may increase and I may decrease, Jesus grant me the grace to desire it.
That others may be chosen and I set aside, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That others may be praised and I go unnoticed, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That others may be preferred to me in everything, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That others may become holier than I, provided that I may become as holy as I should, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
Rafael Cardinal Merry del Val y Zulueta
For some reason, I thought I was praying to not be loved by others. I thought if I prayed this litany, I would definitely be forgotten and always be set aside. Since I didn’t want more of those things than I’ve already felt due to my situation, how could I pray this prayer? I put it aside for a while, but within the last 2 years, I started praying it several times per week when I go to adoration, and it’s amazing how God has worked on my understanding in Jesus’ presence.
Looking back now, I can chuckle at myself and the apparent reading comprehension issue I had the first several times that I read that litany. Pride has a way of clouding judgement, doesn’t it? How often is it that the moment we experience a twinge of knowing that we didn’t do something very well are we then unable to accurately hear (or in this case, read) everything that follows that initial convicting statement?
The Litany of Humility is a difficult prayer for any of us to say (and mean!) in our humanness. We all struggle with pride in one way or another. In recent years I’ve been learning more about the many manifestations of pride, and that has been personally convicting. Pride encompasses far more than being boastful or arrogant- pride includes not relying on God for everything, and it includes thinking that anything we accomplish is because of ourselves and our efforts (as if we could do anything on our own!). Yikes- this is a tough one, especially when the secular message of today is to be self-reliant and to make things happen on your own. But the virtue of humility is the antidote to pride!
Enter God’s gift of understanding. When I pray the Litany of Humility, I’m not asking to not be loved. I’m asking for God to deliver me from the desire of being loved. I’m asking Him to deliver me from a slew of desires that honestly set myself up for many disappointments, so having those desires removed from my heart would actually be quite freeing, not awful! I’m not asking for good things to refrain from happening to me; I’m asking to be freed from a multitude of desires that hold me back from living a life of freedom. Then when good things happen, I can enjoy them more, and when good things don’t happen, I’m not as devastated.
My biggest challenge with the Litany of Humility is not my fears, but my desires- especially the desire of being loved. That might not be most people’s experience, but it’s overwhelmingly my experience. I’ve had a hard time feeling God the Father’s love for me at times, for several reasons, so I’m making an effort to bring that road block to the foot of the cross whenever it arises. I’ve also struggled to feel loved by others when their discomfort with my situation has come across as either distance or disdain instead of the uncomfortableness or fear that it really is. Those experiences have made me want to feel loved all the more, thus an even greater need for me to pray with the Litany of Humility.
So I already needed to overcome my desire to be loved, but then I was supposed to pray for others to be loved more than me? Wasn’t it enough for me just to focus on not desiring to be loved? What was the purpose of wanting others to be loved more than me? Was I supposed to be putting myself down, acting like I didn’t matter? That didn’t seem healthy. I grappled with the purpose of that “extra step” and even brought it to a couple of very wise people who encouraged me to just put this litany aside if it was bothering me. But I knew God wanted to work on my heart with this, so I kept searching. I then had a very fruitful conversation with my current spiritual director which brought it all home for me.
The point of that “extra step” of wanting others to be loved more than me is the love part of the “Imitating Christ’s Humility” section in Philippians 2.
“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vein conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking your own interests but each of you to the interests of others.”
Philippians 2:3-4 (RSVCE)
I learned that “extra step” was really just the next step in love. If I am truly loving the other person, I want so much good for him/her, without comparing that to any sort of measure of what I’m receiving in my life. My wanting someone else to be loved more than I am loved really shouldn’t have anything to do with me- it has to do with my care for that other person and how much good I want for him/her. Rather than it being a comparison or an exercise in putting yourself down, it’s a self-emptying gesture. It’s not wanting bad things for yourself, and it’s not thinking you’re worthless; rather, it’s simply wanting so much good for others out of love for them. What a relief.
“In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:
Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death- even death on a cross!”
Philippians 2:5-8
Jesus surely exemplified the love of self-emptying, of humility, and that’s something we ponder and try to imitate, especially during Lent. I’m realizing that when I feel like God is asking “too much” of me, it’s really for my own good and for freedom from what keeps me weighed down in this world. I also recognize that not all desires are bad, including human relationships- we just can’t want anything more than we want Him, and the things we want can’t distract us from Him. It can’t be the end of the world if desires we have are unmet.
The good news is that God will help us with what feels so difficult- we don’t have to do this alone. In fact, we can’t do this alone. Getting rid of certain desires is not in my own power- I have to bring them to God for Him to handle. The beautiful thing is that in the last third of the Litany of Humility, we pray for God to give us desires to replace the initial desires we brought to Him in prayer. We are essentially asking Him to replace desires that can weigh us down with desires that allow us to increase in humility and charity and will help us to imitate Jesus more closely, which is the whole point of life. What a beautiful gift and something to ponder this second half of Lent!
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What a beautiful reminder and reflection for Lent. Thanks for sharing your struggles and thoughts. 😊
Thanks for reading!
Having only recently been introduced to the Litany of Humility, my thoughts when I got to the last section was ‘ooh, this is where the rubber hits the road!’ Great post as always 🙂
Yes, that last part doesn’t beat around the bush. 😉 Thank you!
Thank you Alexa for this timely reminder of the need for humility – and how it even our desire for humility supports us in our life with the Lord – May God bless you – today and always.
Thank you, Fr. Greg! God bless.
So insightful, as usual. A great prayer to reflect on. Also, an important reminder about the power of Adoration.
Thank you, and yes indeed!
Thank you for bringing this Litany back to mind. If this were a scorecard for even just my yesterday … ooph …
I love how the litany and your writing help remind me of not simply of what not to do, but also what to do. Not simply ceasing bad habits, but replacing them with goodness.
After all, if we clear our lives of darkness without adding light, we are still left in darkness.
Thank you so much! I appreciate the feedback. You’re so right- there are virtues of every vice, and God helps us make those switches to good. His grace is such a blessing.